Remembering Neannette

The excitement of going out of town was only heightened by the fact that my new, 1-month-old nephew was accompanying us on his first family trip to Indianapolis. This was no ordinary occasion. Our beloved Neannette was turning 70 and had no clue that the entire family was coming to surprise her for her birthday. I could hardly stifle my excitement as we inched our way to her door. A muffled scream is all we heard, and then laughter...and then there were tears. Tears which symbolized the deep love which fills a room with audible affection when no ones even speaking. Then, there was laughter, loving-insults, and a room full of more love than which ought to be legal. Mom and Grandma scolded Neannette for the way she looked and the way her house looked. "Mother, you should be ashamed," I can almost audibly hear my grandmother say. This celebration overflowed to a local Ryan's, which also included our then matriarch, Aunt Marguerite, who too, was meeting baby Joshua, the newest addition to our family. We all looked on lovingly as she broke him in with the family ritual of spoon-feeding him coffee. Josh is now 23, I'm 32, and our beloved Neanette is no longer with us. But even as I type this, the love, the pride, and the bond that has sealed the foundation of my life all ascends to the surface. And I realize...that even though she's no more, she's manifested herself in my family's lives in so many facets. Losing a loved one leaves a deep void and it often causes me to ponder, who will ever love me like she did? And even though I've yet to answer the previous question, I can forever dwell and reminisce on precious memories such as these. Still remembering you, Neanette! With love, Jason

Community Crisis

I’ve searched deep within for words to address a growing concern. It seems the longer I toil for the correct ones, the more frustration continues to fester within me. Then, there’s the fear of alienating others by gauging an issue that pertains only to the black community. It seems every time I bring up a ‘black issue’, people tend to incorporate the issue into general society, feel I’m being exclusive, or are just simply unwilling to address the issue. However, my mind constantly revolves around the current state of our community and what can be done to push things into a more positive direction. This whole expression of ‘doing me’ has driven many to focus away from community and more on self. It saddens me to encounter so many great people who act oblivious to what’s going on (or what’s not going) in our community. These people often describe themselves as great—have great jobs, careers, and are faring reasonable well. However, the burden to contribute back into the society they were born into is nonexistent. It’s ironic how we often struggle so greatly to express ourselves as individuals that we fail to realize that the search for identity is pulling our community apart. Pop culture is affecting us to the point that it has contorted many our goals and it has even altered our definition of success. We’ve been so busy ‘doing it big’ lately, that we have forgotten to ‘do it’ at all within our communities. As we strive relentlessly to attain benchmarks of superficiality, it appears the true need within our community has gone untended and almost forgotten. How can true identity be established and one feign internal contentment while totally abandoning the needs and issues plaguing their direct community? How can one tout success, yet do nothing to make an impression on the environment in which they derive? Oh how I long to see the strong communities that I was privileged to be reared in by people who came together to work for a greater goal that was a bit bigger than an individual. Yes, we are individuals; and also may even have personal goals we seek to obtain. But we still are a part of an integrated society that is greater than the accolades that one person can achieve alone. To all my black folks (LOL), I humbly ask you to consider how your personal success can change the black community for the better…