Rantings of A 30-Year Old

Wow. So, yeah…I’m 30 now. Many of my overzealous plans and benchmarks I have missed by leaps and bounds; nonetheless, I’m still here and I’m happy. I’m surrounded by love, surrounded by many manifestations of God’s love, and I’m comforted by the promises which have YET to be fulfilled in my life. I don’t take lightly the accomplishments I’ve been fortunate enough to make: maintaining a 16 year relationship with God, completing high school and going on to finish college, having successful jobs all of adult life, and most recently pursuing entrepreneurial endeavors. I am extremely blessed, yet I have been so often derailed by the false images of where I presumed I’m supposed to be, then it occured to me in a grand epiphany. Jason, there are no sad songs to be sang in regards to your life. You are gifted beyond measure, a God-fearing & loving man, a loving brother, son, uncle, and friend to all and above all, you’ve committed your life to God. Every broken covenant, transgression, iniquity, hurtful comment, ended friendship, severed relationship, false rumor, sad season, or failed test has made me into the man I am today. There’s a powerful passage of scripture in Deuteronomy 33:25, and it simply states, “and as thy days, so shall thy strength be.” The manifestation of that very passage in my life is why I am able to walk in the strength that I walk in today. There is experience in wisdom, strength in staying, and aggression in aging. So in spite of the many marks that I’ve missed—and trust there has been many, I am now a stronger, wiser person with five times the spiritual depth that I possessed at 20. Sometimes there is such a powerful presentation to be observed in simply just holding on. There will be times we don’t understand, we lack answers, we are absolutely clueless, don’t feel confident, don’t have a Word for anyone, can’t preach heaven down, can’t pull a split lick of anointing out of the depths of Churchville, and I’ve come to realize that is OKAY! Our humane tendency to fall into seasons of stillness don’t have to be looked upon as a bad thing. We have a savior because we need redemption, so why do we spend so much time trying to impress people who are going to talk about us either way? It is my experience during these times of “stillness”, true character is built. I implore you ALL to keep loving each other. It takes so much more work to be catty, backbiting, and calculating then it does to be loving, caring and gracious. I say to all my friends, family, and associates whether distant or close, I love you ALL! I pray that if I have done anything that may have offended you that you would forgive me, and I ask that you would continually keep me in your thoughts and prayers as I do the same for you. And above all, I ask for all of you to look deep within yourselves to discover that sacred place of peace. Don’t let anyone or any situation cause you to be without peace! So many times I have let this life take away my peace of the mind to the point where I felt like I was being constantly tormented. To be honest, I even felt tormented about turning 30. For weeks and months, I’ve dreaded turning 30 all because I deemed that I’m not where I am supposed to be, but God has came and reassured me that I am where HE wants me to be, and that is more than enough for me! Again, I reassert my love to you all! God Bless….Jason