I am NOT My Hair!

It was sheer terror that gripped her face. She took two cautious steps back, gripping her purse with enough force to make her pale fingers turn red. As I gaged her facial expression, my mind instantly began to weigh out the possible factors contributing to her fear. Perhaps, it was the broad shoulders mounted on my 235-pound large frame, or maybe it was the fact she was in a small elevator at 1:00am, or maybe there was an evil beam radiating from my brown eyes. As I offered the gentlest, “Hello” I could muster, her countenance seemed to exhale. As my mind raced to understand why she seemed so afraid, I suddenly realized what was causing her discomfort; it was my stocking cap. Most would think that the infamous melody penned by India Arie would apply to only women, but as I rode the elevator with this frantic lady, I wanted to scream to her I am not my hair! I have always tried to make it a personal vow to not to go in public with my stocking cap or doo-rag on unless I absolutely have to, but knowing that I had a 8:00am seminar to attend the next day, I didn’t have much choice if I wanted to showcase my deep hair waves that next morning. The irony of the story is I am a good guy. I have never been arrested, had a warrant in my name, or for that matter, never even been suspended from school; however, because of the stocking cap on my head, I was presumed to be a criminal. Taking precedence over the racial profiling and the ignorant stereotyping just cast on me like a spider web, was my pride. My feelings were hurt. I was just 24, feeling like I had arrived, traveling cross-country, staying in a 4-star hotel by myself, and because of a stocking cap, my confidence was hurt. Maybe I was in the wrong for wearing a stocking cap in public, but I’ve witnessed other ethnicities wearing their head-coverings too. I felt that no matter how educated, polished, or refined I felt I was, I would always be seen as a possible threat to others who didn’t share the same skin color as me. I returned back to my room to ponder on this ludicrous encounter I just had, and it dawned on me--you really can’t compete with ignorance.